Summer vacations are here, and children are out of school! For most children, this is an exciting change, promising relief from school work and more play time. Longer ago, parents viewed summer vacation as providing more hands for the summer work.
But we live in a changing world. Fewer family farms. Smaller families. Mechanized ways of doing things. More away-from-home activities. Faster living. Coming and going.
For some families, summer vacation means a time when children will have a lot of unsupervised time. Or a time they will be enrolled in other group activities -- sports, summer camps, swimming classes, summer Bible schools, etc.
The modern mindset is that children are provided for when they are having fun with other children their age level.
Children do enjoy other children. And there is a proper place for group activities. But in the confused values and hectic schedule of this day, children need relationship with their parents more than ever. Many well-meaning parents believe they are providing for their children when in truth they are neglecting them.
Children need the security of solid relationship with their parents. No one but parents can provide that for their children.
In the absence of solid relationship with their parents, children may be kept busy having fun, and be empty. It affects their behavior -- they seek attention inappropriately. It affects their attitudes -- they are uncooperative, moody, or even hostile. It affects their ability and productivity -- they lose interest in activities that could be enjoyable and helpful to their development.
So how do we build relationship?
The answer is not difficult. It is a fundamental law of relationships: we need to spend enjoyable time together. That is how relationships are built.
Following are some practical ways for parents to build relationship with their children.
Even if cutting back on a work schedule would mean a lower standard of living, would that be so bad? Living without the latest conveniences doesn't really hurt children. Being neglected does.
Let's not sacrifice relationship with our children for things that won't matter a dime when life is done.
John Coblentz
Every parent who reads this list of suggestions can easily see a sobering truth: we cannot build relationship with our children without spending time with them. The number one hindrance to building relationships is being too busy. As parents we must accept the reality that we cannot do everything available to us in our communities, in our occupations, even in our churches. Among the thousand things calling for our attention, we must prioritize.
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